Wedding Attire

Cullen
Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
Off to a friend's wedding on Saturday with Sons numbered 1 and 2.

Number 2 son is buying a new suit, tie and shirt and intends to look devilishly handsome.

Number 1 however is a different kettle of fish. He likes to think of himself as the black sheep of the family, a bit of a maverick in fact. He has said he will not wear the traditional suit etc but will come in ripped jeans, Che Guavara T shirt and converse trainers. He has omitted to mention whether he will be wearing socks or skiddies.

My question is how best to deal with this problem, do I sit him down in a manly fashion and reason with him or beat him to an inch of his life, taking care not to let the bruises show at the wedding?
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Comments

  • *Jo
    *Jo Registered Posts: 509 Epic contributor 🐘
    I would just let him go in what makes him happy. You could take a change of clothes just incase when he gets there he feels uncomfortable but Im sure the bride and groom would want everyone of their guests to feel comfortable in what they choose to wear. The other option is to see if he would comprimise by a nice new pair of black jeans and black shirt with allowing him to wear his choice of tshirt underneath??
  • A-Vic
    A-Vic Registered Posts: 6,970 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    personally i would wait till his back is turned grab all the clothes you dont want him to wear and hide it the day before :)
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    Jo, thanks for your advice. You sound a kind and reasonable person. Compromise is always the adult way forward in an argument.

    I think I will still beat him with a stick and hide his clothes as A Vic suggests. I just need to break into his house whilst he is at work and remove his wardrobe.

    (Actually who am I kidding, his wardrobe is for his porn collection, he keeps his clothes on the floor.......)
  • blobbyh
    blobbyh Registered Posts: 2,415 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    While he's at work or school on Friday - assuming of course, he's not a job dodger/student bum - empty his room, put everything into storage, leave a couple of bin bags outside the house, change the locks, phone numbers etc and don't answer the door. Once you've gained the upper hand, let him know through the letterbox who's boss and unless he wears the rightful clothing on Saturday, he can look forward to spending the foreseeable future settling down on friends sofas before eventually outstaying his welcome whereupon a life on the streets will beckon, suffering total social exclusion, progressive mental breakdown and more than likely death before the age of 40.

    Harsh but arguably necessary.
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    I like the cut of your gib......
  • A-Vic
    A-Vic Registered Posts: 6,970 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    or all else fails bribe
  • sarahwilson
    sarahwilson Registered Posts: 567 Epic contributor 🐘
    How about offering him a choice of two outfits? One being the suit and tie you actually want him to wear and one being a taffta bridesmaid dress, that way you both win?
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    I haven't got the confidence that he would pick the suit.
  • sarahwilson
    sarahwilson Registered Posts: 567 Epic contributor 🐘
    ROFL, I suppose thats the flaw in my fiendish plan!!
  • A-Vic
    A-Vic Registered Posts: 6,970 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    Cullen wrote: Β»
    I haven't got the confidence that he would pick the suit.

    Either way its gotta be better than the jeans lol
  • LeeS2009
    LeeS2009 Registered Posts: 1,515 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    Cullen wrote: Β»
    Off to a friend's wedding on Saturday with Sons numbered 1 and 2.

    Number 2 son is buying a new suit, tie and shirt and intends to look devilishly handsome.

    Number 1 however is a different kettle of fish. He likes to think of himself as the black sheep of the family, a bit of a maverick in fact. He has said he will not wear the traditional suit etc but will come in ripped jeans, Che Guavara T shirt and converse trainers. He has omitted to mention whether he will be wearing socks or skiddies.

    My question is how best to deal with this problem, do I sit him down in a manly fashion and reason with him or beat him to an inch of his life, taking care not to let the bruises show at the wedding?

    How old is he?
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    He's nearly 25, still a child.
  • LeeS2009
    LeeS2009 Registered Posts: 1,515 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    Cullen wrote: Β»
    He's nearly 25, still a child.

    does he still live with you?
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    No he moved out 4 years ago, mumbling something about wanting to live an independant adult life, or somesuch nonsense like that. Kids, eh!
  • LeeS2009
    LeeS2009 Registered Posts: 1,515 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    Cullen wrote: Β»
    No he moved out 4 years ago, mumbling something about wanting to live an independant adult life, or somesuch nonsense like that. Kids, eh!

    I think its potentially quite simple - inform him that you fully respect his style of living and admire his independance, but also assumed that he had grown into a man and would appreciate that making an effort for people he loved (you) and people he liked (your friends) would actually mean something to all of you, thats why everyone makes an effort - for each other.

    If however he can see no reason why he would make an effort for you and your friends then tell him to sit his ass at home....and miss the free food and alcohol.

    Personally i cant see the problem with what he wants to wear if your friends are ok with it, but maybe worth a thought or an option lol.

    I usually find with "younger" people that if you show them respect but then take it away for juvenile or immature actions and explain it honestly, it usually gets them thinking about there actions more. It might be the wrong way to go but seems to work for me lol
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    Well, Lee, I'll give it a go and if it doesn't work, can I beat him senseless then?
  • CJC
    CJC Registered Posts: 1,657 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    I'd let him go as he likes. He'll feel a complete tit and a valuable lesson will have been learned. You'd probably want to figure in the beating senseless bit somewhere but I've not quite worked out how yet.
  • Jan
    Jan Registered Posts: 654 Epic contributor 🐘
    CJC wrote: Β»
    I'd let him go as he likes. He'll feel a complete tit and a valuable lesson will have been learned. You'd probably want to figure in the beating senseless bit somewhere but I've not quite worked out how yet.

    I'd allow him to go as he likes, as long as his hair was washed and he didn't smell unpleasant.

    Also warn your friend, he/she might want to keep him out of the photo's, especially if you have beat him up beforehand!
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    So the consensus is, a thorough thrashing (that wasn't easy to say) and let him wear what he wants, even if it's a taffeta frock?
  • Jan
    Jan Registered Posts: 654 Epic contributor 🐘
    yep!

    Let us know how it goes - the wedding as well as the thrashing!
  • blobbyh
    blobbyh Registered Posts: 2,415 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    CJC wrote: Β»
    You'd probably want to figure in the beating senseless bit somewhere but I've not quite worked out how yet.

    Easy. Get hammered, go home, start a random argument before beating him senseless in a drunken rage. Not only will he learn respect for his elders but you'll also be teaching him a valuable lesson about the dangers of binge drinking.
  • Cullen
    Cullen Registered Posts: 592 Epic contributor 🐘
    Well I decided to broach this tricky subject last night, I simply said how much it would mean to me if he wore the suit and tie outfit and hugged him.

    (When I say hugged, it was more of a headlock.)

    I swear I heard him say something vaguely compliant, so I think the job's a horse.

    I'll let you all know about the wedding. Apparantly there won't be any children, so Number 1 and 2 sons have committed to provide the sliding on their knees across the dance floor and as we are an Irish family, we'll kick off the fighting.

    I love traditions.
  • LeeS2009
    LeeS2009 Registered Posts: 1,515 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    Cullen wrote: Β»
    Well I decided to broach this tricky subject last night, I simply said how much it would mean to me if he wore the suit and tie outfit and hugged him.

    (When I say hugged, it was more of a headlock.)

    I swear I heard him say something vaguely compliant, so I think the job's a horse.

    I'll let you all know about the wedding. Apparantly there won't be any children, so Number 1 and 2 sons have committed to provide the sliding on their knees across the dance floor and as we are an Irish family, we'll kick off the fighting.

    I love traditions.

    nice one hun
  • mark130273
    mark130273 Registered Posts: 4,234 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    sorry to say but that is just not on ......thinking that a son can not put his own personal feelings aside just for one day and making sure that the bride and groom have the perfect day is just so bang out of order.. but to try and make him do something which he does not want to do is going it be very very hard ?

    the only thought that i could have would be ....an ultimatum.....either a suit or dont come...weather he would listen to that ...i doubt it !?
  • blobbyh
    blobbyh Registered Posts: 2,415 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    an ultimatum.....either a suit or don't come...whether he would listen to that ...i doubt it !?

    Oh I dunno Mark, you'd be surprised what rohypnol can achieve...
  • LeeS2009
    LeeS2009 Registered Posts: 1,515 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    blobbyh wrote: Β»
    Oh I dunno Mark, you'd be surprised what rohypnol can achieve...

    I dont think he would be surprised robert, hasn't he got a little girl/boy? lol
  • blobbyh
    blobbyh Registered Posts: 2,415 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    LeeS2009 wrote: Β»
    I dont think he would be surprised robert, hasn't he got a little girl/boy? lol

    A little girl, but I suspect it was his wife that took the rohypnol herself before getting it on with hubby...
  • LeeS2009
    LeeS2009 Registered Posts: 1,515 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    blobbyh wrote: Β»
    A little girl, but I suspect it was his wife that took the rohypnol herself before getting it on with hubby...

    Ah yeah.....couldnt take the "do it for your country" moment
  • Diannew
    Diannew Registered Posts: 2,814 Beyond epic contributor πŸ§™β€β™‚οΈ
    blobbyh wrote: Β»
    A little girl, but I suspect it was his wife that took the rohypnol herself before getting it on with hubby...

    Robert !!! such cutting words LOL
  • burg
    burg Registered, Moderator Posts: 1,441 mod
    Personally if he doesn't live with you let him go how he pleases. You can plead you had no control over what he wears and its up to him.

    He may well be doing it to get the reaction.

    Don't interfere and speak nothing of it and see what happens...
    Regards,

    Burg
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