Builders
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Good morning all,
The company I work for is extending and the builders have at last finished most of the exterior work. Problem is, the sods are now working inside and since yesterday have now begun work on the other side of the office wall. In a nutshell the constant drilling and hammering (which I now believe they are doing unneccessarily) is starting to get on my nerves. So my question to you is
Is there any way in which I could legally beat them to within an inch of their lives and escape a prison sentence?
Im thinking community service, you know, helping older people tend to their gardens, things like that.
The company I work for is extending and the builders have at last finished most of the exterior work. Problem is, the sods are now working inside and since yesterday have now begun work on the other side of the office wall. In a nutshell the constant drilling and hammering (which I now believe they are doing unneccessarily) is starting to get on my nerves. So my question to you is
Is there any way in which I could legally beat them to within an inch of their lives and escape a prison sentence?
Im thinking community service, you know, helping older people tend to their gardens, things like that.
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Comments
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Re:Builders
You could always "gently" place the hammers where the sun doesn't shine and say it was an accident
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Re:Builders
I think we need a test case here.
Go for it and hopefully there will be internet access in prison so you can tell us how it went.
LOL!0 -
Re:Builders
How about you show an interest in there drills :shock: and ask to "have a go"but accidentally lose control of said drill and I'm sure you can imagine the rest of the story
you could then plead freak accident due to loss of control of power tools
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Builders
I apologise in advance for not knowing your family circumstances Giants, but don't you have a couple of teenagers who could do it for you?! In fact, the little buggers could virtually commit builder genocide and all they'd get would be a free holiday to the Butlins at Bognor Regis....ukGiants wrote:Is there any way in which I could legally beat them to within an inch of their lives and escape a prison sentence?
... hang on, I was in Bognor last week, and I guess that might be a little too harsh considering the offence.
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Re:Builders
o.k. I'll try the "hammer and sun dont shine" approach first. :x
Bear with me, I may be gone for sometime!0 -
Re:Builders
If they're wearing eardefenders you might have a case. That would indicate the level of noise - and you could definitely get let off. Just remember to keep saying pardon everytime you're asked a question.0 -
Re:Builders
I would say that if they are wearing ear defenders and you haven't been supplied any, then you have a right to walk away from your desk and refuse to work until the noise is back within the safety levels.0 -
Re:Builders
o.k. that didnt go as planned.
I crept up slowly behind him as he stood there looking at his work, took the offending hammer (which smelled odd and and had a sticky residue on it) off his work bench and held it firmly in my hand. I was just about to strike when he quickly turned around and said in a Julian Clary type voice "ooohhh thats a nice toy" :-o
Well, I was stunned and my initial reaction was to get my back to the wall, no idea why I did that, must be my bodys self-defence mechs kicking in.
Anyway, Im thinking Robert has the right answer and believe it best if I take in-direct action and get some young, slightly daft looking young lad to do the dirty deed. :twisted:0 -
Re:Builders
LOL0 -
Re:Builders
Yeah, just follow my patented formula;
1) Get a couple of overly aggressive fifteen year olds off the street - they should be in adundance for it's still the school holidays (not that many of them go to school even when it is term time)
2) Sit them in front of "Manhunt" on the PS2 for a few hours to get them in the required murderous mood
3) Tell them you have a copy of "Virtual Manhunt III", put dark swimming goggles over their eyes and a set of claw hammers in each hand
4) Point them in the direction and just watch them go...
Works for me every time...
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Re:Buildersblobbyh wrote:Yeah, just follow my patented formula;
1) Get a couple of overly aggressive fifteen year olds off the street - they should be in adundance for it's still the school holidays (not that many of them go to school even when it is term time)
2) Sit them in front of "Manhunt" on the PS2 for a few hours to get them in the required murderous mood
3) Tell them you have a copy of "Virtual Manhunt III", put dark swimming goggles over their eyes and a set of claw hammers in each hand
4) Point them in the direction and just watch them go...
Works for me every time...
Yes, I believe this is the way to go. Tomorrow there will be no more odd talking builders who walk with a slight limp hammering on the office wall.
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Re:Builders
Maybe not, but you could well be in line to become UKcharlieManson rather than merely ukGiants...0 -
Re:Builders
Cant you go in and talk about accounts and then they will be a sleep in two minutes lol....I work in the office of a construction company and this works on the boss most days.
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Re:Builders
Zzzzzz0 -
Re:Builders
See what I was talking about and I only had to say the word
and for a deep sleep you talk about IAS's and Ratios
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Re:Builders
LOL!0 -
Re:Builders
Are these builders dressed in the classic "builders uniform", of low fitting pants exposing a butt-crack you could park a bicycle in?
If so, you could maybe complain to management that the terrible sight is causing you trauma, and you might get sent to Benidorm for a week to recover
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Re:BuildersIanionline wrote:Are these builders dressed in the classic "builders uniform", of low fitting pants exposing a butt-crack you could park a bicycle in?
Yes, and he's had something parked in there, not sure if it was a bicycle though.
Ianionline wrote:If so, you could maybe complain to management that the terrible sight is causing you trauma, and you might get sent to Benidorm for a week to recover
I took the earlier advice of an established poster on here................ terrible accident, just terrible.0 -
Re:Builders
LOL!0
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